


Two Weird Girls Get a Dog

by galaxy_of_words



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen, Not Epilogue Compliant, can be read as pre romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-02
Updated: 2020-05-02
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:27:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23963098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galaxy_of_words/pseuds/galaxy_of_words
Summary: Jade Harley is having a bit of a hard time adjusting to life on Earth C. Terezi Pyrope has a solution, the kind of solution with fur.
Relationships: Jade Harley & Terezi Pyrope
Kudos: 5





	Two Weird Girls Get a Dog

**Author's Note:**

> This was for a homestuck bigbang about a year and a half ago that I just never posted. Not epilogue compliant.

No one really visits Jade’s apartment. It’s a nice enough place, located on the ground floor of a nice apartment complex so that Jade can easily step outside at any time and feel the earth beneath her feet (it helps sometimes when she wakes up thinking that she’s still drifting forever in the golden yard, to be reminded that she’s on solid ground now). Though New Seattle is a mostly troll city her particular area is diverse enough that Jade doesn’t really stand out and even though her neighbors know her as the polite young lady on the first floor they don’t speak to her often. 

Her lack of visitors doesn’t mean she’s lonely though, she sees her friends all the time. She spends lots of time at Karkat and Dave’s hive, so much so that they have an extra room for her, and she visits John and Rose whenever she can and sometimes even goes and meets up with Jake for a while. Still whenever she’s spending time with her friends it’s normally at their houses or somewhere out in the world. Her apartment is private, a space of her own for when people just seem like too much after so many years being on her own. No one really visits and that's why it's so weird that one night she opens up the door to the figure of Terezi Pyrope.

This is surprising for three reasons. The first being as was previously mentioned Jade doesn’t really get visitors. The second reason is although Jade and Terezi get along they aren’t exactly close friends, and the third reason is that Jade was pretty sure Terezi had been searching the black hole for the past few months.

“Uh Hello?” Jade says her greeting coming out more like a question than anything else. Terezi doesn’t seem to be phased at all and is wearing a large smile. Her appearance is slightly less put together than Jade expected. Terezi’s hair is a bit messier than Jade remembers it being and her glasses are askew not to mention the mud splattered about her clothing. Her cane is tucked into her armpit as both arms are occupied holding what seems to be something wrapped in a hoodie.

“Jade! I’m glad I found you. The first apartment I tried was most certainly not you. Did you know that your neighbor has the absolute worst possible taste in vape flavors,” Terezi says wrinkling her nose in distaste. Jade barely has time to absorb a single word Terezi said much less respond to it as the troll girl slips past her and into Jade’s apartment.

“Hmm, much less green than I expected,” Terezi says nose in the air as she sniffs out her surroundings. While she’s doing so Jade finally finds her voice. 

“Terezi, it’s great to see you and I don’t want to be rude, but is there a reason you’re here?” 

The troll stops sniffing around and turns to face Jade somehow managing it without sight.

“There is in fact a reason I am here!” 

Jade is just about to ask what that reason is when she realizes that whatever is under the hoodie in Terezi’s arm is moving.

When Terezi uncovers the wiggling lump in her arms it takes a second for Jade to recognize exactly what she’s looking at. It’s a puppy. It’s absolutely filthy and it's not immediately clear what breed it is. What does become clear as she looks at the little ball of dirt and fur is that he or she is missing an eye. For one second it reminds her of Noir but she quickly puts that thought out of her head. It’s not the result of some mistaken prototyping, it's just a puppy. A puppy that for some reason Terezi has brought to her door.

“Why do you have a dog?” Jade asks moving forward to scratch behind the puppy’s ears.

“I found this small barkbeast and have decided to care for it,” Terezi says. Jade nods.

“So why bring it here?”

“Because I have no experience in caring for an infant creature and you, if I remember correctly, previously had a barkbeast!”

“Bec was not like normal dogs and also he wasn’t a puppy!” Jade says hoping the crushing fear she’s feeling doesn’t show in her voice.The idea of suddenly having to care for another creature is terrifying to Jade. There is a reason there are no plants in her apartment, she’s just not sure if she can keep anything alive anymore. “Besides,” Jade continues. “It’s not like you don’t have any experience caring for an animal. Didn’t you have a lusus you had to feed and care for and stuff?”

Jade wasn’t aware that blind eyes could roll but Terezi’s do.

“Jade,” She says slowly in the tone people use when talking to a small child or more accurately, a very dumb person. “My lusus was an egg.”

“Oh” Jade says, thrown off guard. She did not know that.

“So,” Terezi continues on. “I would like to propose that we both care for the barkbeast - in the human tradition of shared custody.”

“You want us to both own the puppy?” Jade asks tentatively. Co-parenting a dog is a bit less intimidating than suddenly being forced to care for one on her own.

“Yes!” Terezi responds enthusiastically. “I have decided that you are the best candidate, and to start this partnership you will watch her tonight,” Terezi says, suddenly thrusting the animal into Jade’s arms. “Also, as of now my apartment does not allow dogs,” she says with a smile that makes Jade think that that is something about to change.

“Do not worry about feeding it tonight it ate my hamburger, so it should be good. We will procure supplies tomorrow!” Terezi says as she turns and walks out of the door before Jade gets the chance to say anything, leaving her alone in her apartment with a puppy trying to escape her arms.

Jade looks down at the dog whose tongue is lolling out of its mouth and its tail shaking. Having it in her arms she can tell that the puppy is pretty dirty.

“I guess you need a bath, huh?” Jade says. The puppy squirms in response and tries to lick her face leaving Jade to wince at the horror of puppy breath.

The process of cleaning a puppy takes longer than Jade expected, but after about an hour she has wet pajamas, a filthy bathroom, and a clean dog that is trying to destroy her towel. She wrestles it away from the puppy that now, post bath, proved to be a girl, and sighs.

“We are going to need to get toys for you, huh girl?” She says. The puppy just blinks in reply. Jade scoops her up and places her down on the bed.

“Stay,” she says firmly before going to her closet to change into dry clothes. When she turns back she’s happily surprised to find that the puppy is still on the bed. Jade makes sure to pet her new friend. “Good girl.” Now that all of the dirt is gone Jade can tell that the puppy is some type of mutt, a big one that will probably continue growing. She has mostly white fur with a few brown specks and while she is missing her right eye, the wound is healed and healthy looking.

That night Jade falls asleep to the soft sound of another living creature breathing and she finds that she likes it. It’s strange, after so long alone, but she finds she likes it. When she wakes up the dog is no longer on her bed, but she can hear a soft bark from the other room. As she gets up she feels a swell of confidence that she can probably do this. And then she steps in a puddle.

***

Jade is still not sure if bringing Terezi to the pet store is a good idea yet. So far the other girl has licked every reptile tank and Jade’s pretty sure she’s purposely running the shopping cart over strangers feet. Still, since the puppy doesn’t have a leash yet, Jade needs to carry her everywhere and it’s nice to have an extra set of hands.

“To the food!” Terezi commands.

There are more types of dog food then Jade could imagine. Bec never had normal dog food so Jade finds herself a little overwhelmed looking from organic to puppy based to even breed based foods. Eventually she decides, and momentarily handing the puppy off to Terezi, she grabs a large bag of food and places it in the cart. Terezi deposits the puppy back into Jade’s arms and very quickly whips the cart around to head to the treat aisle, aiming for unwary feet along the way. 

The puppy starts to squirm in Jade’s arm, whining as it tries to get closer and smell all the treats. Jade can’t really blame it. The dog treats still smell kind of yummy and she has to try really hard not to reach out and taste one. She holds the dog a little closer to her chest. She’s more human than dog she really is! She can do this, she has self-control and is a responsible member of society who does not eat dog treats in the local Petsmart.

She’s reminding herself of this as she watches Terezi grab a treat, sniff if, and eat it without pause. 

“Terezi!” She calls out. “We can’t eat the dog treats,” Jade tries to whisper, but it ends up just a tad bit too loud. Terezi turns to Jade with a smile on her face.

“But my dear Miss Limeade, how can I be expected to feed these to my daughter without first knowing the quality?” Terezi says dramatically before popping another treat into her mouth. “This one should be sufficient,” she proclaims before grabbing another one and holding it in front of Jade’s face. “Of course, you should test it as well she is your barkbeast daughter too.”

Jade bites her lip. The dog struggles in her arms trying to take the treat. Jade shifts the dog in her arms enough to grab the treat and pop it into her own mouth. She is suddenly very thankful that she doesn’t have a tail because if she did it probably would be wagging. 

“That’s very good!” She tells Terezi, “I mean very good for the puppy!” Terezi smiles in a way that makes it very clear that she did not buy Jade’s weak attempt at a cover up.

The troll girl goes very still for a second and starts to sniff the air.

“Jade,” She says her voice carrying a tone that can only be described as utter delight. “Is that a barkbeast wearing clothes I smell?”

Jade peaks around Terezi to spot a miniature poodle wearing a sweater. 

“Yeah, it’s super cute! Should we get the puppy some clothes?” She asks.

“Jade, I cannot continue existing unless we purchase some very cute barkbeast clothes.”

By the time they go to checkout they have a bright, red leash with a matching collar and walking harness, no fewer than six brightly colored bandanas, one hideous striped dog sweater, assorted dog toys, a dog bed, and finally a small dragon costume.

They are about to walk out of the door before Jade stops in front of a dog tag printing machine. The metal charms proclaiming Fido and Bella glitter in their display case as a happy couple holds a puppy. There’s about fifty shapes, from dog bones to stars and trees. Some are even painted different colors. 

“We need to get her tags,” she tells Terezi. After a bit of bickering they decide on silver tags in a simple bone shape. Then they get to the part where they are asked to put the name of the dog and Jade pauses.

“Her name is Madam Stinkbutt,” Terezi declares, trying to push Jade out of the way so that she can enter the frankly horrible name.

“No!” Jade almost shouts, pushing Terezi away from the keyboard and then manages to get her voice under control. “She’s a good dog and needs a good name.”

“What about Vriska?”

“You can’t name the puppy Vriska!”

“I don’t see why not. Vriska is a perfectly acceptable barkbeast name besides they look like a Vriska,” Terezi says with a sharp toothed smile.

“Just because she is missing an eye doesn’t mean we should name her Vriska! She deserves a normal dog name like…” Jade trails off as she thinks. “Rosseland.”

Terezi stares at her which is surprisingly effective for someone whose eyes are hidden behind red tinted glasses.

“That,” she drawls, “Is a terrible name.”

Jade, like the mature, young adult she is, sticks her tongue out. Terezi tried to fight her for control of the keyboard once again. After a minute of scuffling the unnamed dog manages to escape from Jade’s arms and bolts across the store. It’s another ten minutes before the two girls are back in front of the tag engraving machine.

“I propose that for now we just put our phone numbers on the tag and we return when we have agreed upon a good name.” Terezi suggests. “It is time to bring our many purchases to your hive and also feed our beautiful daughter.”

Worn out Jade can do nothing but agree and, with a snap so unnecessary even Terezi could see the fingers, all three of them and their purchases are teleported to the floor of Jade’s apartment.

***

It’s 4am and Jade can’t sleep. It’s weird how her narcolepsy had changed to mostly insomnia after the game. What’s even stranger is having normal dreams, after thirteen years of dreaming on Prospit and then dreambubbles, it’s somehow super strange to just have dreams that don’t mean anything. A flying giraffe is just a flying giraffe. But there are no dreams tonight just staring at the ceiling trying not to drown in thoughts. 

It’s quiet, but not too quiet. The island always had sounds of nature and the distant sound of waves, and on the ship there was the scattering, tapping feet of consorts and the odd banging of old pipes. Here there is a hum of the airconditioning and the muffled sound of traffic. It’s still quiet enough that she notices the sound of her front door opening. She only has time to sit up before Terezi bursts into her room the still unnamed puppy in her arms. 

“Jade, get ready we are going to the nearest coastal location immediately,” Terezi declares a little too loud for the mostly silent apartment.

“How did you get in?” Jade asks puzzled. She’s surprised, but really, she shouldn’t be.

“That is not important! What is important is that we get crime-dog to a beach as soon as possible.” 

Maybe another time, Jade could argue or ask why, but it’s late and she doesn’t really want to be alone right now anyway. And the sound of the ocean would be a bit like the island, the waves not even in the distance.

“Can I get shoes on at least?” Jade asks, already climbing out of bed and stretching her arms over her head. “Also, crime-dog is not the name we are using.”

“If you must. Also, I disagree, but we can discuss that later.” Terezi says as the dog not called crime-dog squirms in her arms. Jade considers changing out of her pajamas, but decides against it. Comfort over fashion.

“So do you want me to-” Jade makes a vague gesture as she searches for words. “The spacey thing?”

“Duh.” Terezi answers. Jade nods and searches her mind for a good place to go to and once she finds somewhere suitable she touches Terezi’s arm and does the spacey thing. There’s no snap this time.

The beach they end up at is not really similar to the beach on Jade’s island. It’s more rocky for one thing, not soft sand. It’s surrounded by cliff faces and large rocks that dot the shoreline and shallow waters. Jade and Terezi sit side by side on the pebbled shore as the puppy runs into the water splashing about among small waves. She stops every once and awhile to look into a tidepool. Occasionally, she barks at a creature as it stirs in the shallow tide pools, but mostly, she quietly enjoys the rocky beach, much like Jade and Terezi.

For a while it’s quiet. Just the sounds of the dog playing in the water and the gentle roll of the waves. If Jade closes her eyes she can almost pretend she’s home on her island as she’s hearing the sounds of the ocean and smelling the salt of the sea. The rocks under her are like her piles of Squiddles. For once, it seems like sleep could come. Wanted and needed. A deep, peaceful type of sleep, not like the naps she’d been taking recently. No, here at the ocean she was at peace. When Terezi breaks the silence it's almost startling, there hadn’t been anyone on the island with her.

But Jade finds she really doesn’t mind Terezi interrupting her thoughts.

“So, Miss Limesicle, you were not at ‘game night to increase bonding for antisocial losers,’” She states doing a pretty decent Karkat impression when she uses the name he had bestowed upon the monthly tradition. She almost gets the simmering anger right. 

“You went?” Jade asked, surprised that Terezi had gone. She had never seen her at one before.

“I did! I went and I brought Judge Judy and everyone loved her and you were not there to stand beside me and take pride in our adorable woofbeast daughter, and I would like to know why.” Even with blind eyes she manages to stare directly at Jade in a way that makes Jade shift uncomfortably. 

“I just wasn’t feeling too well. I’m sorry I missed it!” Jade says.

“Jade,” Terezi says her voice unimpressed. “I can smell lies and you currently reek of them.”

Jade sighs and draws her legs into her chest. She watches the puppy play and takes a deep breath before she decides what to say.

“Sometimes it’s kind of difficult for me to be around people. I mean a lot of it is the noise and the movement I’m just not too used to lots of other people around.” It’s not the whole truth, but it is a truth and Jade hopes that Terezi will let her get away from that answer. One look at the troll girl’s face proves that Jade will not have such luck, and for some reason, she continues on unprompted. It’s like the waves breaking, something inside her breaks too.

“I don’t like talking about it too much. It makes me seem kind of bitter, you know? But sometimes being around Dave and Karkat and Kanaya and Rose, they are all just so used to each other. You guys had three years together on that meteor and you know how to talk to each other and you have jokes and banter and I just didn’t have that. I was so alone on the ship and even when I thought I was going to meet you guys I was so scared that you were going to hate me when you found out John died. And it’s stupid and selfish and I hate that I think it but sometimes I wish I wasn’t the only one who had to go through that. That I had someone else with me on the boat who could understand. But I don’t,” Jade takes a deep breath and tries to blink away tears in her eyes.

“Sometimes, I worry that those thoughts just prove that I’m a bad person. That I’m selfish.”

Terezi doesn’t respond for a while. Her head is tilted up and her sightless eyes are turned to the stars like she can see them. Jade looks at the stars too, it’s strange that they are different now that there is a whole galaxy that isn’t the one she grew up with, but still belongs to her somehow. As the two of them stare up the puppy steps out of the waves, shaking off drops that catch the moonlight like falling stars, and trots toward them, collapsing between them and panting heavily. Jade’s hand slides into wet fur and somehow the smell of wet dog is comforting. It reminds her of Bec. The silence stretches on a little longer, but it’s not uncomfortable. Not the same as before, but it’s not bad. It’s light. Like the stars in the velvet night sky.

“I killed Vriska,” Terezi says, her voice steady. “Not in this timeline obviously, but in the other one, the one I remember. I stabbed her in the back.” Jade is surprised, but not too surprised. She knew troll culture was different, but she always thought Vriska and Terezi were good friends. But, then again, Terezi has always been a wildcard. 

“The worst part is,” Terezi continues “I felt bad. I regretted it.” 

Jade hesitates before speaking. This isn’t something she’s good at. She doesn’t know how to talk about this sort of thing. She’s terrified that she’ll say the wrong thing, but she desperately wants to say the right thing.

“What’s wrong with regretting killing your friend?” She asks gently hoping with all of her heart that she’s not screwing up the fragile conversation.

“Vriska deserved to die,” Terezi says incredibly frankly. “She was dangerous. She had killed one of our friends she was willing to kill again and it was the only way to stop her and save our own lives. It was the right thing to do. And that might have been a different Vriska, but it’s still Vriska. Sometimes I think it might be for the best to leave her in the black hole.” 

There is so much here that Jade doesn’t understand. It makes her feel like she’s twelve again just an ignorant island girl trying to grasp things beyond her reach. Like a plant that keeps losing leaves and she can’t get them to stop falling. She doesn’t know how Terezi feels about Vriska.

She does know one thing though. If there was ever a person in paradox space who knew what lonely looked like Jade was it, and Terezi, behind her sharp smiles and cackling laugh, Terezi was lonely.

Knowing this doesn’t make anything easier. It’s not something Jade knows how to fix and she doubts Terezi would ever talk about it. For a moment it’s like being on the ship again with nothing to do. No way to help. Just useless. It’s that feeling that weight that leads her to lean against Terezi lightly, just to remind herself that this is real. She doesn’t expect the troll girl to lean back but she does and it's suddenly very real. It’s her, Terezi, their puppy, and the sea. And Jade might not be smarter or wiser or less afraid but she’s calm. She’s okay. And that’s something.

***

“What about Brownie?” Jade suggests.

“Too boring!” Terezi declares. 

The two girls are sitting on the floor in Jade’s apartment trying desperately to get the subject of their discussion to sit on command. Said subject would much rather chase her own tail or chew on Terezi’s cane.

“Hmm Tesla?”

“Colonel Big-Mac.”

“Princess Marie.”

“Shazam the Terrible.”

“Madame Bitch.”

“Noir 2 Electric Boogaloo.”

“Obama.”

“Cookie Dough”

Jade pauses before throwing out another name.

“Wait Brownie was too boring, but Cookie Dough isn’t?” She asks Terezi. The troll girl shrugs.

“It’s the superior food, but you are correct it is missing something.”

Jade thinks.

“Doctor,” she says at the exact same time Terezi says “Duchess.”

“So it’s been decided!” Terezi says reaching over to pick up the newly named pup. “You are Duchess Doctor Cookie Dough. First and last of her name.” The Duchess tries to lick Terezi’s face in response. Terezi puts her back down.

“Now, Duchess Doctor Cookie Dough, sit!” Terezi commands. 

Duchess Doctor Cookie Dough fails to sit and instead dedicates her effort to licking Jade in the face, managing to knock the girl onto her back. Between Terezi laughing at Jade’s misfortune and the Duchess showering her with affection and her own muffled laughter, Jade comes to a realization.

She’s happy.

**Author's Note:**

> Ten minutes later Terezi renames the dog Dave2 and Dave2 knocks over a lamp causing chaos.


End file.
